Journal Of Applied Misanthropology

Why Liberals Hate Capitalism

It's Simpler Than You Think

Whether the people be led by the Lord
or lured by the loudest throat;
If it be quicker to die by the Sword,
Or cheaper to die by vote...

Little-d Democrats hate capitalism.

Get your mind out of the gutter. By 'little-d', I mean, people who believe in democracy as a viable system, not members of the Democratic Party of the United States.

This article was inspired by Jon Katz' latest two articles, one on the Disney-owned, and one on Time magazine hyping the new 'Moses' picture instead of talking still more about the impeachment idiocy. In both of these articles, Mr. Katz (who unlike most liberals very often does have good, intelligent things to say) exocriates the various corporate powers-that-be for their production of fetid tripe fit to satiate only the most banal and base instincts of the teeming hordes. ( words. Not his.) In doing so, he reveals, quite unwittingly and unconsciously, the reason why the left is so anti-capitalistic, despite that fact that capitalism is the only economic system that actually does feed the hungy, clothe the naked, and do all those other things leftists like to think are important.

It's because capitalism proves democracy doesn't work.


Because capitalism is the only truly democratic economic system! The people aready do control the means of production, via the only method which is needed or which can work -- by making choices as to how they spend their money. When I choose Pepsi instead of Coke, I am casting a vote to control the distribution of resources. When I sit at my computer instead of watching TV, I am seizing control of the media. True, my vote is petty and small, but it's still more meaningful than my vote for President.

Further, the marketplace supports the rights of minorities more than any other democracy. Go to the supermarket. You will see not one or two kinds of soda, but dozens, many with 'constituencies' of only a few percent. True, there is always a cut off point -- some of my favorite products were evidently loved by too few -- but there's a lot more choices than 'bleeding heart tax&spend liberal' or 'crypto-fascist pawn of the Christian Coalition', which is all we're offered each November. (Imagine, if you will, a store which sold only Coke OR Pepsi, and forced the minority to choose the soda of the majority!)

Now then:Mr. Katz is annoyed because Disney, via, offers pap, and he thinks people will go for it. He is annoyed that TIME chose to come up with some phony-baloney story about 'religious history' as a cover for their shameless hyping of the new Dreamworks Moses flick. What the hell does this have to do with democracy and capitalism, you may ask?

Well, go ahead! I said you may ask! ASK!

Ah. Thank you. You see, it goes like this:

Therefore undermining the greatest conceit of the small-d democrats:That if only we could somehow eliminate the 'special interests' or the 'corrupt politicians' or the 'inequalites of voting rights' or whatever the latest excuse for the latest failure of the Glorious Peoples Farming, I mean, the latest election which sent the same old scumbuckets back into power is, then we would have a utopia of peace, love, brotherhood, tofu, and birkenstocks.

Capitalism is a slap in the face to those who want to cling to their faith in democracy. It is a continuous, pointed, painful reminder that when The People are free to choose for themselves, they will choose cartoon Mosii over deceitful Presidents and blustering Congresscritters.

Here's the facts, people. Go to any newsstand. You will most likely see magazines such as The Nation, Mother Jones, National Review, American Spectator, Liberty, Reason. These magazines, which cross from the far left to the far right to the far libertarian, feature scholarly, in-depth articles on politics, both in terms of 'current events' and political theory. They talk about complex issues, deal with root causes, raise provactive questions and do not give pat easy answers or discuss the breakfast habits of movie stars. The sum circulation of all of them is, probably, far less than that of TIME or Newsweek alone, never mind, God help us, People.

Democracy in action, Mr. Katz. There are no scurrilous agents making sure people buy 'Newsweek' instead of 'The Nation', 'Entertainment Weekly' instead of 'American Spectator'. No shadowy figures skulk and prowl, making The People read 'People'. People make choices, and most of the time, most of them choose to not think.

And that's something to think about, when you demand greater democracy. If you want to know what a world run by The People would be like, well, imagine a cartoon Moses crushing an impeachment proceeding -- forever.

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