What is Breakfast Crunch? Well, it's probably a no-name knock-off cereal sold in huge plastic bags with a picture of, I dunno, a dancing hippo on it, but it's also a feature where Lizard sits down at his computer, eats some breakfast, and makes up some allegedly useful bit of game crunch. Guaranteed to have all the quality, completeness, and playtesting implied by "I am writing this in an hour, after having been dragged out of bed by a hungry cat and before the caffeine has hit my system." Consider yourself warned.